Sting (4 Stars)

This is the sixth film in the Stuttgart Nights Festival.

Charlotte lives in an apartment building in New York City. The house belongs to her grandmother's sister. That's a great aunt, isn't it? Most of the apartments are used by her family.

One night a small meteorite smashes its way into her grandmother's apartment. Charlotte finds a small spider and takes it into her room. She calls it Sting and feeds it bugs, but the spider is very unusual. It whistles when it's hungry. It grows rapidly, doubling its size within a few days. It's remarkably intelligent, opening the lid of its jar when it wants to hunt for food, then closing the lid again when it returns.

Sting feels affection towards Charlotte, but everyone else in the house is in danger. It's soon as large as a dog and able to wrap humans in a web.

In theory the film could be terrifying. The problem is that the picture is too dark for most of the film. Do you remember the good old days of the 1960's horror films? Or any films, in fact. Even if a scene took place at night, the picture was still clear, and shading was used to show that it was nighttime.

The Invisible Fight (4½ Stars)

This is the fifth film in the Stuttgart Nights Festival.

Wow! This is the first Estonian film I've ever seen. I wonder if it's typical.

The story takes place while Estonia was part of the Soviet Union, so it's some time between 1944 and 1991. My guess is that it takes place towards the end of that period.

Rafael served in the Soviet army as a guard on the Russia-China border. While there he learned kung fu. After returning home to Estonia he wants to continue with his martial arts, so he applies to become a monk in an Orthodox monastery which teaches martial arts. I didn't know the Russian Orthodox Church encourages martial arts. I learn something new every day. Rafael only wants to stay a short while in the monastery, but the head monk sees something special in him. He says that Rafael will become a saint. Rafael doubts this, because he likes drinking vodka and listening to heavy metal, but maybe the head monk is right.

This is a hilarious film. Interestingly, no fun is made of the Christian religion itself. Christianity is assumed to be correct, and the humour comes from the way Rafael and the monks practise it.

It's already been released on Blu-ray in America.

Meanwhile on Earth (3 Stars)

This is the fourth film in the Stuttgart Nights Festival.

Franck Martens was an astronaut who took part in a space mission. The space ship disappeared. No explosion, it simply disappeared. Three years later he's considered a hero. A statue has been erected to him in his home town. His younger sister Elsa sits gazing at the stars every night wondering if she'll ever see him again.

One night she hears his voice talking to her. He tells her that he's the only survivor of the mission, and he doesn't know where he is. Then she hears a second voice telling her that they (whoever they is) will return Franck to her if she does them a favour. Over the next three days she has to take five people to a place in the forest, either one at a time or in a group. If they stand at the right place, or even just walk over it, their bodies will be occupied by them. They promise it isn't an invasion, they just want to live on Earth.

This is a quiet dreamlike film. Questions of morality aren't directly discussed. Elsa just wants her brother back. I found the film too quiet for my tastes.

Love Lies Bleeding (4 Stars)

This is the first film in the Stuttgart Nights Festival.

It takes place in an unnamed town in New Mexico, close to the Mexican border. Jackie is hitchhiking from Oklahoma to Las Vegas to take part in a body building contest. That doesn't look like the most direct route, but when you're hitchhiking you have to take whatever rides you can get. She's short of money and sleeping rough. In the opening scene we see her having sex with the manager of a gun club to get a job as a waitress.

Louise is the manager of a gym. When Jackie comes in to work out the two become lovers. They're both lesbians. Jackie only sleeps with men when she needs something from them.

It's a small town where everyone knows everyone. Louise's father is the owner of the gun club. The man Jackie slept with is Louise's brother-in-law JJ. Louise's father also makes money by illegally smuggling guns into Mexico. The FBI suspects him, but doesn't have enough proof to act.

Things start moving when Louise's sister Beth is so badly beat up by JJ that she ends up in hospital. Jackie takes revenge, breaking into JJ's home and killing him with her bare hands. Murder needs to be carefully planned. Spontaneously killing someone leaves clues. Jackie and Louise do their best to get rid of the evidence, but it's not easy.

The plot meanders on, with ever deepening conflicts. I shouldn't give away anything else, except that the film becomes even more fascinating as it continues.

I have a simple question. Is it normal for a bodybuilder to be a heavy smoker? I would have thought that Jackie would do without cigarettes in order to remain fit.

This was a good film to open the Nights Festival. I admit that I enjoyed the lesbian sex scenes with gratuitous nudity. What do you expect from me? I'm a man.

Mad God (4 Stars)

Mad God? Mad film.

"Mad God" was sold out in the cinema today. It's a visual treat, but I didn't understand it at all. I spoke briefly to the people sitting on either side of me, and neither of them had a clue what it was about.

After the film there was a live video conference with the director, Phil Tippett. There were several questions from the audience. In retrospect I regret that I didn't make a note of them all. One person asked the question that was on everyone's minds: "What's the film about?" Phil's reply was, "It's about 80 minutes". Further questions tried to tie him down, but his answers were always evasive.

There's no dialogue in "Mad God". Phil praised the golden age of silent movies. He claims that they were the days when directors were creative, unlike today when Hollywood just makes films according to standard formulas. When asked what silent movies he would recommend, his reply was "Google classic silent movies". He's a nice guy, but trying to get information from him is like squeezing water from a stone.

"Mad God" is Phil Tippett's lifetime work. He worked on it for 33 years from 1987 to 2010, continuing whenever he wasn't interrupted by other projects such as "Robocop" or "Starship Troopers". Mostly he worked alone, but other collaborators joined him for brief periods over the years. When asked how he knew the film was finished, he said that when the contract with Netflix was signed the film was complete.

I checked Netflix as soon as I got home, and it's not available. Maybe it'll be streamed at a future date. It's not the sort of film that can be given a big run in the cinemas. True, it was sold out today, but we were an audience of film freaks who'll watch anything weird.

The Mummy [1999] (5 Stars)

After watching "The Mummy" again last month, I decided to buy the remastered 4K collection. Wow! The picture quality is far superior. I have no more complaints. The picture does justice to the wonderful film. Look how beautiful Rachel Weisz is as Evelyn.

Evelyn Carnahan isn't just a pretty face, she's also very intelligent. She can read Egyptian hieroglyphics. Or is she really intelligent? After opening the Book of the Dead she reads it aloud, reassuring Rick O'Connell, "It's only a book. No harm ever came from reading a book". That's a dumb thing to say. Has she never watched "Evil Dead"?

And this is the result, only 40 seconds later. Here's my advice to my readers: if you ever find an old book, whatever language it's written in, don't read it aloud!

And a few days later she's tied to an altar doing a Betty Page impersonation. "No harm ever came from reading a book"? Now she knows better. I hope.

Success Rate:  + 3.2

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Lupin III: The Castle of Cagliostro (4 Stars)

I was totally unprepared for this film in the cinema today. I thought it was a Japanese children's film, but it's actually the restored version of a classic 1979 anime. I realised that I'd misjudged the film when I looked around and saw that Oliver was the only child in the audience. Having an age rating of 6 doesn't mean a film is made for children.

Fortunately Oliver enjoyed the film, so it wasn't a wasted visit.

Lupin III is a master thief from Japan. Together with an accomplice he robs the casino in Monte Carlo, but as they drive away he examines the loot and finds the notes are all counterfeit. He dumps the cash, and he heads to the nearby Kingdom of Cagliostro, which he deems to be the source of the counterfeit cash. This is the first of many things I don't understand about the film. Why should he go to Cagliostro? What's in it for him?

On arriving he sees a young woman being attacked. He tries unsuccessfully to protect her. She's taken away by the attackers, but she drops her ring. It's a signet ring, and Lupin deduces that she's the Princess of Cagliostro. Further investigations reveal that she's being forced to marry the Duke of Cagliostro against her will. He wants to inherit a hidden treasure, which is strange, because not even the Princess knows where it is. And why does he need to inherit it? He could simply steal it.

Other characters arrive in the kingdom. There's an Interpol agent who wants to arrest Lupin. There's a Samurai warrior of uncertain allegiance. There's a spy called Fujiko who seems to be a romantic interest of Lupin. "The Castle of Cagliostro" is the second film in a series. Maybe I would have understood it better if I'd seen it first.

I found the film very good, despite not understanding everything. The opening titles reminded me of the Batman TV series, which is always a positive. I've read reviews that call it the greatest anime of all time. Shall I watch it again? I don't know. I'd like to watch it accompanied by a fan of the film, not sitting alone in my room. It's a film that needs to be explained to me.

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Bodyguard Kiba 2 (4 Stars)

"Bodyguard Kiba 2" was released in October 1973, only six months after the original film. Those were the good old days. They didn't waste time, they brought out sequels before the public had time to forget the original films.

The Tesshin School wins a karate tournament. A rival school disputes the tournament and issues a challenge. The school's master (whose name I've forgotten, sorry) refuses to accept the challenge, but Kiba is hot-headed and engages in a fight to the death. After he kills his opponent he's arrested and imprisoned. It's not said how long, but I assume it was a relatively short sentence. After his release he says he's retired as a bodyguard, but he's hired by a nightclub owner called Akamatsu.

Once more, the noble man Kiba is working for an evil boss. Akamatsu bought the nightclub with money that he stole from ambushing an American military transport. Kiba comes into personal conflict when Nanjo, one of his prison friends, is released. Nanjo also participated in stealing from the Americans, but he was the only one arrested. He threatens to kill Akamatsu if he doesn't give him his share of the money. Kiba says that he'll kill Nanjo if he tries. It's his job.

The sequel isn't as trashy as the original film, but I'd still label it as Japsploitation. The fights are very stylised. What I mean is, before opponents begin a fight they stand with their arms raised in a fighting pose watching one another. When the fights begin, there are only a few strikes before one of them falls over.

Bodyguard Kiba 1 (4 Stars)

This 1973 film has been released with different names over the years, including "The Bodyguard". "Karate Kiba" and "Karate Killer". Today it's best known as "Bodyguard Kiba 1".

Naoto Kiba is a member of the Tesshin Karate School. A few years previously his master emigrated from Japan to America, but now he and his school have come into disrepute. There was some sort of incident in which his master killed a bull. It's not specified any closer.

When Kiba is flying to America there's an attempt to hijack his plane. Kiba easily overcomes the armed hijackers, using only his bare fists. In America he holds a press conference, in which he offers his services as a bodyguard. A day later a mysterious Japanese woman approaches him and hires him for four days. Despite repeated questions, she refuses to say who she is or who is trying to kill her. Kiba realises it's serious when four masked men attack her on the first evening.

Kiba accompanies her to Japan, and the attempts on her life continue. Finally he finds out what's happening. She was the lover of a Mafia boss in New York. After he was gunned down in public she stole a suitcase of heroin and has arranged to sell it to a Japanese gang. Kiba doesn't take a moral standpoint. He's been hired as a bodyguard, and he'll do his job whether or not he approves of his client.

I've long known about "Bodyguard Kiba 1", but today is the first time I've seen it. I was surprised how trashy it is. The soundtrack is brash and aggressive, like the blaxploitation films of the 1970's. If anything, I'd call it a Japsploitation film. It's enjoyable, but at several points I had to shake my head in amazement. Was this typical of early 1970's Japanese martial arts films? I don't know.